Sanity and happiness are an impossible combination
Sanity is a cozy lie.
Recent Entries 
6th-Apr-2015 10:36 pm - Hey look I'm not Dead!!
winter leaves
Wow I so suck at posting here, don't I? Once again I do post fairly regularly on Facebook so feel free to find me there (Shannon Prano). Just remember I don't discuss fandom or Fic there.

Anyway, that's not why I'm posting now. I just wanted to drop in to let you all know I'm having A Spinal Fusion done on Wednesday. I hadn't said anything before because I was waiting until I was positive it was happening this time. I have a different surgeon who, I think, is more skilled at dealing with medicaid and disability and he was able to get it covered. Although either way I was having surgery because he agreed to do the other surgery if necessary.

It's come down to absolutely needing to have something done now. In the last few months I've had more than a few days that my mom has had to help me get out of bed because I couldn't straighten my body into an upright position. I can't stay standing without leaning on something for more than a minute or two. When I have to go into stores I'm literally sweating so badly my hair looks like I just came in from the rain and since I'm not having a panic attack the consensus is it's from the pain. So yeah, surgery is no longer just an option, it's a necessity.

The surgery is on Wednesday, barring any complications I'll be home sometime Thursday. I'll then be mostly confined to the house for thirty days. Although that may get cut a tiny bit short I'd I feel able to go see Age of Ultron on May 1, but our local theater is close. Has assigned seating, and recliners that leave tons of space to let people walk past you without bumping you so it shouldn't be a problem that close to the thirty days.

I will do my best to let velvetwhip know how the surgery went either by email or text on Wednesday so she can keep anyone updated that wants to know what's happening...well I haven't asked her yet but I'm sure she won't mind, :)

If I'm up to it I may post but I wouldn't count on it before the weekend. Again though, I'll probably post to Facebook on Thursday so you can always check there I'm public.
4th-Dec-2014 10:50 am - we may not both survive...
winter leaves
My mother was given a Chromebook/laptop for her new job. They have many nurses and aides so charting and making notes on patients is much easier if everyone can do so online. I know it's easier because my mom worked as an aide at a home health company way back when they were new and it was a bitch having to go into the office every time they were sending you to a new house or someone called in and you picked up their patient for that day. They protect confidentially by locking patients from everyone's view except people assigned to that patient. Unfortunately it's only easier when you know how to use a computer. My mother still doesn't always remeber that she doesn't need to close the browser and reopen it when she wants to leave her email and go to a website. And she still thinks Safari is something different than google on her iPad and phone. Which means in the week she's been seeing patients I've heard the following, most multiple times.

* "they gave me a new tablet." "No not an iPad, this one is bigger and has an attached keyboard." --for the record I've had laptops for almost seven years and Michelle even longer, she's seen laptops before.

* they said I had to sign in to Google, but then said to put in my email nsme and password, I don't want them to see all my emails"-- she has no idea that Google and her email are the same. Or that her employers can't see her email just the nursing chart stuff.

* "why did you change the background!? They didn't tell me I could do that, I don't want to get in trouble." -- I changed it to a sunset from a sunrise. Both default Windows wallpapers.

* "I don't know what to do, I spelled a word wrong and they told me not to use back!" -- she thought they meant backspace not the back arrow for going back a page.

* "I hit enter and everything disappeared!" -- I've heard this more than I can count. Usually it's been a case of enter saving the file and giving you a new page for charting another visit to that patient. Just need to go into the main menu and find the 'missing' file.

* it won't log me in! I put in my password."-- problem here is 99% of the time she's put a password when it wanted a username..

* "the computer won't open, it says it can't open without the internet." --I still don't know what she did there. It let me log in to Windows just fine, not the internet until I put in the password.

All of this plus the long running problem of calling everything a text. Actual texts, facebook posts, Facebook private messages, and emails.

Of course we mustn't forget her thinking she's sending memes privately because she tagged the person she wanted to see it. You have no idea how many times I've explained this in the last two years.

Obviously, though I'm being an impatient bitch when I explain the SAME DAMN THINGS ten times in a week or sometimes in a day.

Also just being a bitch when I don't understand what she's talking about. She's using the wrong word and I'm the problem for thinking she was talking about something else entirely. Because Of course I should know she means a fscebook post when she says someone texted her.

And whenever something goes wrong and I ask what she did before it happened she starts crying and yelling at me for "blaming her" for it. No one is fucking blaming her but unless the computer, iPad, or phone acted spontaneously she did something that made it happen and I can't fix it if I don't know what made it disappear, shut down, etc. if she pressed the K key and the entire thing crashed I need to know this to fix it. It's not blame. If she took it to a computer repair place they will ask what she was doing when it happened as well.

So yeah, I'm in computer training hell. I should've got her a computer class for Christmas.
3rd-Dec-2014 10:28 pm - oops
winter leaves
So I told you all about using the Rainbow Loom to help with some problems, I've also figured out it can help with panic attacks...assuming one happens where I can conceivably use it. Which isn't many places unless I want to carry a twelve inch (at least) loom with me everywhere. Which is why I should've been kept away from the computer Monday....

I needed more rubber bands and the color options are so so much better online than at the craft store. So I went to just order a couple multi color bags of different styles (jelly, glitter, Persian, Egyptian, silicone, etc) that's it. $7 worth of bands (between 300 and 1000 bands depending on silicone or rubber). Not a problem right?

Yeah....they were having a Cyber Minday Sale. I ended up with I think ten bags of bands (they had them bundled in sets I ordered three bundles), a Monster Tail loom, which is basically a small portable loom, and colored C clips to clasp the bracelets. I ended up spending $40. But it did mean free shipping! (That justifies it right?)

Read more...Collapse )
winter leaves
So, I suck at posting here, I know that. I really need to do it more but once I stopped being involved in fandom most of my posting moved to Facebook...unless I don't want family to see it anyway. So here's an update on my life for the last few months.

Umm, let's start with family, and for purposes of this post Jonathon is family because as he says we (mom, Michelle, Marisa, and me) have done more to make him who he is than his mother has. stuff with bullet points...Collapse )
25th-Oct-2014 11:02 pm - driveby post and request...
winter leaves
Delilah's daycare is having s Halloween Costume Contest with the prizes all being free baths of one kind or another. You have no idea how badly I could use these prizes.

So, you vote by "liking" her photo in the comments of this post.

So please, please, please, if you have a Facebook swing by and vote for the lab shaped Taco. I'd really appreciate it. I'd say Delilah does too but that's a lie, she hates wearing the costume and she despises baths, but since it's my bed she's stinking up she doesn't get a vote in entering this.

Obviously the post is doe. Under Shannon Prano, but for those that need a bigger visual, this is the picture I need you to vote for:

Is this not the cutest dog ever?Collapse )

Thank you everyone! And the credit for this awesome picture is to Lemondade Photos, and specifically my sister, Michelle, who despises doing pet photos because she's afraid of dogs but still did this for me so we'd have really good Halloween photos this year.
4th-Oct-2014 09:47 am - Would anyone be interested...
I'm apparently weaker when I pain and am letting this would talk me into possibly hosting a Jamberry party. Of course since I hate people to be near me and I'd be inviting the same people my cousin did for the most part, I don't want to host anything in my house (also have a very big dog that doesn't deal well with people being noisy) so if I did it I'd be doing an online party.

So the question is would any of you be interested in purchasing something like Jamberry Nails? Online parties are on facebook, and last about a week where the consultant posts online games for prizes.

For those that don't know what Jamberry is, it's a nail wrap/polish company. Both my sister and cousin Kristen have used them and say they really do last two weeks to a month without coming if applied properly. It just takes more time to apply than nail polish. And so it's believable that they do work well My cousin Kristen is a lifeguard and Aqua zumba instructor so she's constsntly exposing them to harsh chemicals.

But agsin, I'd only have an online party so I told the consultant I'd at least gauge interest from my friends.

So let me know if you may be intersted enough for me to do an online party.
1st-Sep-2014 11:30 pm - Hi!
Hey all,

Just dropping in to say I can see again! Well not really. I still have crap vision and always will, but it is marginally better than it was two weeks ago. I don't have to have the font size on my computer or iPad set at 24pt just to have a chance of making out some of what it says. Or hold it to the side so I'm reading from my peripheral vision which is not at all practical and you look like an idiot.

When I went to the eye doctor I was at 175mg a day of Topamax, now, because my doctors PA took too long to get back to me, I'm down to 75mg. So my vision is slowly getting to the level of It Sucks that it's supposed to be. Once the drug is out of my system, I can see an opthamogist to make sure I don't have a real problem because this doctor does have me concerned. I'll also call his office and see about a follow up with a different doctor to get a script for contacts. But for now I have to deal with the return of near constant migraines. Better than being blind.

One thing I expected to start improving that is actually worsening though is my level of concentration or ability to focus on things. I mean those of you that have known me for a while know I used to be able to focus and multitask no problem. I was working, babysitting, running two awards sites, NHA, and writing in three fandoms. Now I can't even read my email and watch TV without losing tract of one or the other. And that's not an exaggeration, I've had to hide my phone and iPad when I watch TV so I don't do other things and lose track of the plot.

So now I need to find some memory and concentration building games. Anyone know of any preferably free online games or apps for iPhone or iPad that are good for this?
27th-Aug-2014 08:31 pm - Migraines...
winter leaves
For those that don't know I've had chronic migraines since I was 14. I spent more days a week with a migraine of varying degrees than I did without one. My mom took me seriously as a kid when I complained about the pain and other symptoms, the rest of my family didn't. My dad bitched like you wouldn't believe about every doctor bill he had to pay, especially since he, and everyone else with the last name Prano thought I was "too young to have headaches," and "what did I have to be stressed about." This was also 25 years ago when migraines weren't considered much more than really bad headaches. So anyway, I learned to suffer mostly in silence and they went untreated for a long time after the car accident because I had pain pills anyway so I didn't see a doctor.

Four years ago I finally saw a neurologist who specializes in migraine treatment. She put me on Topamax which has done wonders, I've gone from 3-5 migraine days a week to 3-5 migraine days a month. Originally I was at 100mg but it's been raised to 175mg in the last several months. If you read previous posts I have to give up this drug...or my vision. I've been weaning off the drug but I may have dropped the first 75mg too fast since my new PA or Doctor just called me back about the message I left from the eye doctor a week and a half ago. I have to drop the other 100 in 25 per week increments and can't be put on anything new until I'm completely off this. So I'm back to migraines again. I've had so far 7 migraine days in the last ten days. I thought yesterday was going to kill me. Symptoms were worse than they've ever been...except for head pain. I even for the first time had non visual auras. I had taste definitely, and I may be having hearing and smell ones as well, less sure about those. I could be more sensitive to smells and nothing else. I'm very much out of practice for this.

I have at least four weeks of this before we start trying new meds so yeah, yay me, excruciating back pain and constant migraines! I love my life!
19th-Aug-2014 06:53 pm - For those playing along....
I am not diabetic. It's all fine, so I went through all that for nothing.

Now he decides to ask about medications. Turns out Topamax can cause all sorts of vision problems. Including drastic changes in your central vision. Great, so it's just a medication. I really am sincere about that, medications can be changed. We can always find a way around that especially since while I've been on it for three years now it's increased 75 mg a day in the last three months so a problem just showing up now makes sense.

I tell him I'll call my neurologist for an appointment about changing that prescription. He asks why I take it. I explain that I take it for chronic migraines that I've had since I was 14 and this is the first drug that's had any success, so I'll have to work with her weaning off and starting something new. This Doctor tells me "it's just for migraines you can just stop taking it." Two problems here, first is that is spoken like someone who has never had a migraine if he believes giving up the drug that is stopping me from having migraines three or four days a week without a replacement in line is going to happen. Second problem is, it's an anti convulsant you don't just stop them, especially at that high a dose, you have to be weaned off just like you have to be titrated up. I'd rather not start having seizures because I gave it up all at once.

So good news, I'm not going blind!!!! It's only a medication causing loss of vision. Discontinuing the medication should fix the problem.

Bad news, my eye doctor still sucks at explaining so I still don't know all of what's happening I think I'm still making an appointment with an opthamogist to make sure it's all okay. And of course, the first drug since I was 14 is causing vision loss so I'm going to have to stop it because right now my good eye is at 20/80.
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